gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
