Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
