Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
