I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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