why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize