Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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