if you like me you must not know who I am
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Its about making memories worth repressing
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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