cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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