If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
stop calling my apartment porn island.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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