Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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