The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
