When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize