you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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