4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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