Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
