Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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