i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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