I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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