wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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