the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
