Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize