while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize