There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
from now on my penis is your penis
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
