I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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