It's Friday. Sex?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Randomize
