Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
