i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
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