shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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