I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Randomize
