He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize