Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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