We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
