; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
