Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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