Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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