Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
