if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
