I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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