hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
