Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
