i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
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