At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
