I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
