what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I can text with my tongue
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
