You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
