To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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