Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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