he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize