Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize