yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
