i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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